Thursday, 9 March 2023

why live

Why does my mum dislike me so much? Tonight was such hard work, and yet still not enough to win her love. I cannot keep living like this cos this is not a life. 
I loved seeing Sophia, my God daughter so grown up and I'm sorry that I have not been apart of that, but u and I both know that I am nothing but trouble and darkness and  as much as I have loved being apart of the happy birthday celebrations tonight, it will be better for all when i am nothing but a memory of the past 

It was nice to see mums friends all come together to celebrate her birthday. 

Friends Really are the family we choose. 

 I love u and ur beautiful girls so much and after semo being so Nice to me and Sophia chatting me out of what seemed to be genuine interest I finally remembered what it felt like to be apart of something real and loved. 

I am so broken, so alone and so sad and over everything that this life is about. There is no more happiness and good things coming my way. I hace peaked and had the best life when iuved in the uk, i have loved and i have lost and i have defintely learned 

It brings me some comfort to know that there's such a thing as a happy family. And that a it isn't jus a fake term people pretend to have to mask their true dysfunctions 
 

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