How i feel at the moment. Im torn between the need to be thin and the want to be happy.
I want to be happy and i know that the only way i can truly be happy is by gaining weight and eating properly. But right now i feel the only way i can be happy is if i am thinner.
I have no motivation to starve though, this is the problem. I dont want to eat but i am enjoying food too much to give it up altogether.
Work is the worst cos i get so bored that i start eating. I even have crisps some days. I need to do something else when i feel hungry - i just havent figured out what that other thing can be.
It was easy in the bakery - i was surrounded by food all day that i just didnt feel hungry.
I dont know how i feel and what to do really.
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