crazy antics of me

so the other day whilst facestalking friends of friends i stumbled across Rusell, the guy who... assualted me.
(Those 2 words took me nearly 5 minutes to type)
So what i did next i cannot explain it, there is no real reason why, no explaination possible and no outcome from it either.
I created a fake facebook page under the name of kelly smith and then added him - he accepted but must have deleted me realising he didnt know me, so i tried again, and this time lucked out, i was online when he accepted, so i browsed through his profile, looking at all his pictures, reading his likes and dislikes, seeing who is friends are - what pages and groups he has....
I was overcome with emotion and realised i should not be doing this, it was doing me absolutley no good - instead of having his face flash at me through the darkness i know have several images of him drunk and laughing with friends going through muy mind.
He soon deleted me as a friend and i deleted the page.

I dont know how i feel now. This whole time i have seen him as this monster, i have had that image of him standing next to my bed, of him on top of me, breathing on me but now I see him as a human, he has a life. He is a person. Which brings me to my next question...
how can one HUMAN do this to another human? why did he do this? was he that drunk that he lost all control. Did i lead him on to do this? has he done it again? will he do it again?

The last 2 years I have been picturing him as a monster and now i dont, and i think that may be worse. He is a human and he can hurt another human. If he can so easily hurt someone else, then anyone can.
Who can i trust. Do all guys have that inside of them, that if they are pushed too fat they will tip and hurt someone.
Maybe I have a good reason to be affraid of guys. Russel isnt some monster that preys on people, picking his next target to rape and destroy, he is a guy who is living his life. If he isnt a monster - imagine what all those other guys out there who ARE monsters could do.