My mum is spinning out

My mums friend just called me, mum has been round at her place - she is freaking out about my self harming

she wants to get me comitted
she doesnt know how to help  or what to do
she thinks im going to kill myself
she wants me to move back home with her
She thinks this is all her fault...

I dont know what to do
I dont know what i think
I'm not going to kill myself
I self harm to feel something cos right now i dont feel anything but empty inside
I dont know what i feel or what i think any more

My world revolves around food and exercise and losing weight
It is my world and no one is invited.
I love my mum but this is not her fault
She did nothing wrong
I am the failure here NOT her!

I deserve nothing
I dont deserve her love- what kind of daughter am i?

Stay strong starve on